The Mombie Massage…
Mombies, we’ve all been there. You’re playing on the floor with your little one, and you give in to the temptation to just lie down, right there, on that toy-filled floor. As you stare at the crumbs and think, “Dang-it, I need to vacuum again” your mind wanders to what would be truly fabulous right about now…
a back massage! aaaaahhhh…
There’s that spot that’s always tight since you carry your “old enough to walk” toddler on the same hip. And there’s that crick in your neck from another night of dozing off in an awkward position while convincing your child to sleep in their own bed.
If only there was another person who could give you that much needed relief right now! Wait! Maybe there is?
“Can my toddler give me a back massage?” your “so tired you feel drunk” brain ponders.
Well, ponder no more.
Here are my top 10 tips to shamelessly trick your toddler (or preschooler) into giving you a back massage:
1. Take turns playing “Round and round the garden like a teddy bear…”
With this game, you go round in circles on someone’s hand or back and it ends in a tickle under the armpit. This YouTube video explains it.
2. Be a “road” for your child’s toy cars.
You’re Adventure Bay and the Paw Patrol is on a roll. Or you’re the Island of Sodor and Thomas the Train needs to pull some passengers from one end to the other. You get the idea!
PS – being a “road under construction” also makes a super cute and simple Halloween couple’s costume if you’re pregnant!
3. Play doctor.
Tell them you’re their patient, and they can help you feel better by rubbing your back or checking for sore spots.
4. Be a “dead horse.”
They need to bring you back to life before they get a horsey ride. Warning: this ends with your child getting a horsey ride on your back, obviously.
5. Take turns singing “Itsy Bitsy Spider” to each other.
Add in the actions. Your backs are the water spouts!
6. Play a back drawing guessing game.
Let your child draw on your back with their finger and let you guess what they are drawing.
7. Pretend to be a keyboard or drums.
As they “play” your back, make quirky musical noises.
8. Play the “push button” game.
Your kid has to poke your back until they find the special “button” that makes you shout, laugh or sing (you decide).
9. Have a classic massage circle.
This will take at least two children, or get your partner involved too!
Hold up. Scrreeeeech! Time for a reality check.
This is your best solution:
10. Get off the floor!!
Are these ideas sounding like a good idea and you’re about ready to try them? That’s a sign you need a REAL break, Mamma! A toddler massage is about as effective as an elephant massage. (Been there, got the picture!)
Seriously, though, please book yourself in for an actual massage. Ask for it as a gift if need be. It will be worth it!
I only came up with this list after thorough testing and self-application, after all. (Christmas can’t come soon enough! I want all the spa gift cards! Are you reading this, husband?)
Need to reduce your work load? Why not save time in the kitchen? Check out my #bestmomhack.
Thanks for reading! I hope this post made you smile!